Someone should send the memo to Manchester United: they've missed April Fools' Day and will have to wait next year. Nobody did, though, so Liverpool fans will have to collectively laugh and roll their eyes at reports from The Daily Mirror that Liverpool's fiercest rival is to place an opening bid for the services of Raheem Sterling. Everyone's favourite contract rebel scamp wants to leave after rejecting a new contract, giving an unsanctioned interview, and entrusting an agent whose off the record comments lit an already inflammable situation.
Liverpool will reject the bid, of course, as the offer and the club involved are both clearly unsuitable. If a bid is tendered for the Golden Boy, what happens next will be interesting. Will other clubs follow suit with similar or higher offers? Raheem Sterling is not ready for a move to a European giant just yet, which reflects the stance clubs such as Bayern Munich and Real Madrid seem to have taken: monitoring the situation without plans to make a bid. Yes, Rafael Benítez said "we admire Sterling, that's no secret" on his first day as Real Madrid manager, but a deal remains unlikely.
Chelsea and Manchester City seem to be likelier destinations and could conceivably push bidding past the £30 million mark. Such a sum would still not meet the mooted £50 million price tag placed on one of Europe's brightest young talents. Meeting Liverpool's valuation would create an interesting dilemma for FSG, but selling Sterling to Manchester United would be disastrous. Players just don't move between the clubs and haven't for just over half a century. Since then, players have featured for both clubs with stops in between but not directly.
Memphis Depay has already made his choice and will probably feature on the left for the Red Devils. What about the player who broke the British transfer record, Ángel Di María? Louis van Gaal is preparing for a purported title challenge next season and a return to the Champions League, whereas Brendan Rodgers, entering his fourth year at the club, will be concerned with restoring confidence and conviction to his side. This may be summer mischief making to garner hits or reliable information ahead of a bid, but whatever Manchester United do this summer, it won't involve Raheem Sterling in a meaningful way.