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Liverpool 4, Newcastle 2 - Match Recap: Go Home Match, You’re Drunk

A look back at the key moments in Liverpool’s peak Barclays win over Newcastle in Premier League action.

Liverpool FC v Newcastle United - Premier League Photo by Jan Kruger/Getty Images

Liverpool 4 - 2 Newcastle

Reds: Salah 49’ 86’ (pen), Jones 74’, Gakpo 78’
Saudi FC: Isak 54’, Botman 82’

Pre-Match

Liverpool enter the match top of the league, with a game in hand, and a rare opportunity to open up some real daylight over the other title contenders. Standing in the way are the great sportswashers themselves, Newcastle United, who come into the match having lost 6 of their last 7 matches. Somehow that isn’t all that comforting!

First Half

Liverpool start like a house on fire, getting into dangerous positions over and over in the opening few minutes.

The Reds appear to open the scoring from a phenomenal through ball for Nunez to run onto, who passes it on for Diaz to slot, but the Uruguayan’s run was just offside. A moment later Liverpool is back at it, and Diaz is hacked down from behind in the box; it’s an easy decision for Anthony Taylor. Unfortunately Salah hits it right at the keeper, and Trent cannot convert the rebound. The good news is that Diaz is looking back to his most dangerous in the early stages of this match.

Stop me if you’ve heard this one before, but Liverpool are once again at the mercy of a backup keeper, who is of course standing on his head, saving 4 big chances so far.

Diaz goes into the book just before the half for protesting a no call after absolutely being fouled. And then Trent goes into the book a minute later for kicking the ball away, which only seems to be a rule that Liverpool are penalized for, and very nearly gets himself sent after getting up in Taylor’s face. Halftime comes at a perfect time following a series of nonsense calls.

The home side have been by far the best team. They need to make sure the heat of the moment doesn’t get the better of them, and kick on in the second half. Also, maybe sub Dominik Szoboszlai, he’s been all sorts of off tonight.

Second Half

Liverpool finally have a breakthrough! Dom must’ve heard me talking shit, and did well to win a ball in the middle of the park, pick out Diaz, who finds Nunez in the box, who squares to Salah for the tap in. On the other hand, Darwin might be for real cursed after he’s yet again denied from close range twice in quick succession.

Aaand Saudi FC make Liverpool pay for their missed chances by creating, and scoring, their first big chance of the night.

After an hour Klopp makes 3 subs, brining off the cursed Darwin, Diaz, and Dom (who appears to have also picked up a hamstring pull yaaaay), and brings on Gravenberch, Gakpo, and Jota.

This is getting absurd. Newcastle’s backup keeper just cleared yet another one off the line.

LIVERPOOL HAVE THE LEAD AGAIN AND IT’S ANOTHER INCREDIBLE TEAM GOAL! The Reds practically walk it in after Jota plays a clever 1-2 with Salah and squares it to an unmarked Jones in the middle of the goal.

MacAllister comes on for Endo, as Kloppo tries to see out this hard fought win.

Gakpo makes it three, with the worst finish you’ll ever see. The Dutch international terribly miscontrols Salah’s pass, but it goes in the net and it still counts.

This match is drunk, go home. The sportswashers pull one back on a corner.

Jota then wins a penalty after rounding the keeper. And this time Mo converts, 4-2. That...should be all she wrote. SHOULD.

Final Thoughts

I would like to remind readers that this was NIL FUCKING NIL at halftime. The final xG was an absurd 7.21 to 0.59, making this one of their best attacking and defensive performances of the season. Even if it sure didn’t fucking feel like it through most of the match. This was peak Barclays right here. Hope you enjoyed it.

Oh. One more thing.

LIBPOOL! TOP OF THE LEAGUE! LIBPOOL LIBPOOL TOP OF THE LEAGUE!

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