The Week in Search Terms: Bad Klopp

i want liverpool

And I’d like to be happy and well-adjusted but we can’t always get what we want so ¯\_(•¯•)_/¯

how to thank

I mean I suppose something tangible is always nice, something beyond saying thanks or firing off a text or email, even if it’s just a physical card. Depending on their tastes and your budget maybe a bottle of wine or some fancy chocolates or something? In a pinch there’s always a gift card.

I mean a gift card lacks any real kind of personal feeling but it says you tried and everyone can always use a gift card probably unless it’s to, I don’t know, like a pet store or something and they don’t have a pet? That could be a little awkward, I guess. So you should probably make sure the person you’re thanking with a gift card for a pet store actually has a pet first is what I’m saying. Just to be safe.

it will be fantastic

It probably won’t be but we touched on the part where I’m not happy or well-adjusted so maybe I’m not the one to ask?

milner ok

He’s alright.

liverpool fc uk

It’s a good thing you clarified the UK bit or you might have ended up with the latest news about the Uruguayan Primera Division’s Liverpool FC. They’ve actually been around since 1908, though. The Uruguayan Liverpool, I mean. They’re from the port neighbourhood in Montevideo and at the time the port did a heavy trade in coal with most of the ships coming from Liverpool in the UK. Also they’re currently sat in eighth. So now you know.

bad klopp

Go away Barcelona you can’t have him and you’re not going to turn Liverpool fans on one of the best, most accomplished managers in all of football well except for Bob on Twitter but then Bob on Twitter’s a bit of an asshole really and I guess every fanbase has a Bob on Twitter but at least those other Bobs on Twitter don’t get to sign all their noxious bullshit with “YNWA” like doing that makes them untouchable and then you can’t call them on being complete and utter steaming sacks of without it reflecting badly on you because can’t you see they signed off with “YNWA” so they’re totally a Liverpool fan and it’s you who’s the asshole for calling them on it right where was I?

copy of sports page in the east liverpool review jan 28 2017

Um…

world biggest records sex

Um…

big players dont want liverpool

Big players also lose their gig as Sutton United’s backup keeper for conspiring with The Sun to eat a pie on the bench while Manchester’s finest fishwrap promoted a betting line on whether he’d eat a pie on the bench. So. Probably Liverpool don’t want big players either. Or any other players who like to team up with The Sun for that matter.

coutinho signs new contract

I thought I’d told you to go away, Barcelona?

c palace

C Palace run?

7up man