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Everything's the Worst: Incorrigible Reality Edition

Sated from the confidence drained from the veins of Manchester United, ETW returns to a world where the tastiest morsels of misery are found in the home of a storied enemy.

Boo me. Fear me. I am the Destroyer of Defences. Hear my roar.
Boo me. Fear me. I am the Destroyer of Defences. Hear my roar.

Compelled by unearthly forces to wreak constant and unrelenting devastation on the hopes of the innocent and the designs of the brave, ETW has discovered a far more fulfilling pursuit. This alternate modus operandi was not borne out of a drastic and unforeseen set of events but a gradual shift in power. The first day of the sixth month in 2012 was a monumental event. Hyperbole will not be tolerated here folks. It will not be tolerated at all.

Misery has followed Liverpool for many years. This misery would actually be a successful period for most clubs. In the 24 years that have passed since Liverpool were crowned as English football's foremost team, trophies have adorned an already stocked cabinet and magical moments were ingrained in the memories of millions. Domestic and continental cup success with added drama free from misery was a helpful prescription for any ills in the league. What was the problem? Was it the brand new world brought by the rebranded English First Division? Liverpool had eighteen league titles but no Premier League.

1993 was another seismic event. It was the year when Manchester United won the league but it was the first Premier League season. An eighth league title but a first since 1967 when defending champions Liverpool could only finish in fifth spot. Since then, both club and brand appeared to be tied too closely for any Liverpool fan's comfort. Liverpool have finished in the top three only seven times in 21 Premier League seasons whereas the club's bitter rivals achieved those finishes in every single season with 13 titles to boot. Depressing reading but impressive consistency.

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The past quarter of a century was not exactly barren yet footnotes of the most vexing nature would accompany some of Liverpool's greatest triumphs. Gerard Houllier's cup treble in 2001 shredded the nerves, especially in the FA Cup and UEFA Cup finals respectively. In this period, Liverpool's strong defensive organisation served as the foundation for many victories over Sir Alex Ferguson's Manchester United. Danny Murphy was a regular hero against the Red Devils but ultimately, that season in 2002 where Liverpool finished above Manchester United in second place was a false dawn. Liverpool were a more professional outfit under Houllier but lacked the verve of Roy Evans' Liverpool side. Many Liverpool fans enjoyed the football played under Evans but the greater competitiveness Houllier brought was curtailed somewhat after 2002.

Rafa Benitez made Liverpool dream again. Winning the European Cup in legendary fashion would ensure immortality from 2005 onwards but the continued progress in Europe dragged a glorious past back into the present. Benitez oversaw some staggering tactical triumphs and dominant displays along with some narrow victories that dangled ones nerves over an unforgivable guillotine. Europe's greatest names and fierce domestic rivals visited Anfield and those nights wrestled with any negative emotions in one's soul and pulverised them. Forget your troubles and dismantle your fears for tonight is your night. Liverpool would lift you, excite you, frustrate you, and toy with every emotion you ever possessed.

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When Liverpool last won at Old Trafford, it was an amazing scene with a Dossena garnish. Tasty. However, Liverpool's win last weekend was different. It wasn't close. It wasn't tense. It wasn't at Anfield or a neutral ground but at Old Trafford. Liverpool were better and superior. Liverpool were clearly better and superior. Forget rousing home victories against a timid Olympiakos side. Liverpool were the real deal. A team that won with undeniable superiority but did not display its full capabilities. There were parts of the performance that were merely acceptable even if the result was eminently gratifying.

ETW was not completely satisfied with the performance yet elated with the result, one which humiliated an opponent. It should have been more yet more than sufficient damage was inflicted. This is most pleasing. Liverpool had more to give but did more than enough. That is the mark of a side that should be respected. If Liverpool continue in this vein then Brendan Rodgers' side will be the perfect vessel to inflict the incorrigible reality of ETW on opponents far and wide.

Cardiff City should be afraid, very afraid indeed. Premier League sides can change their names and the colours of their home kits but they will not be able to hide nor will they be granted mercy. Liverpool is coming for you and everything will be the worst.

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