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The Week in Search Terms: Cat in a Space Suit

People find their way to the Liverpool Offside using all kinds of search terms. Some of those terms can seem strange, unusual, or just in need of an answer. Here are a few of them.

Brad Jones is not a cat in a space suit, but he does have nice hair.
Brad Jones is not a cat in a space suit, but he does have nice hair.
Clive Mason
against who did liverpool lose this season

Manchester City, Aston Villa, West Ham, and Basel. Which wouldn't be so bad over half a season or thereabouts, but given it makes for four losses in nine matches across all competitions, well, yeah. It's kind of shit. In related news, you just made the Baby Fowler cry. Hope you're happy. Jerk.

brad jones hair

He's a Dapper Dan man.

flucking guide

Not really our thing; maybe try the University of Skex.

bst exercise

I assume that's a typo and you meant to search for "best exercise," in which case it really depends on what your goals are. As a broad answer, though, it's always worth considering a rowing machine, since they work every major muscle group as well as providing a relatively low-impact cardio workout. And if you actually were looking for information on British Summer Time, this year it ends on October 26th. Either way, you're welcome.

cat in a space suit

Cat-in-spacesuit_medium

bright side of mondays

Lasagna?

drinking tea in a pub

I'd generally advise against asking for tea in a pub. I mean, it's going to be late at night or maybe even early the next morning and you'll just get odd looks. And not hey look at that person being cool and different and stuff odd looks. More did he just walk out of a 19th century asylum odd looks. Plus, even if they do have tea and are set up to brew some for you at 2AM, one would imagine it wouldn't be very good given it'd most likely be made with tea bags that had sat on a shelf for five years.

Which isn't to say there might not be the odd pub that serves a good cup. But you're probably going to be fighting pretty long odds on it and might as well stick to a pint or three. I mean, you are at a pub.

what liverpool need to win the title

It's a touch early for projections, but if you assume 86 points will be needed to win the league again this year, Liverpool need 79 points from 32 games—or nearly 2.5 points per game the rest of the way. The good news is that's right about what they managed in the second half of last season, so it's not impossible. The bad news is that given how poorly they've started this year, they would need to maintain that kind of form for three more months than last season to be in the title picture again.

lalalalalalalalala

Can't hear you.

what is a marquee signing in football

Nobody really knows, so it's mostly any player that everybody decides is a marquee signing. It usually helps if they score goals and aren't English, though—Liverpool were willing to trigger Diego Costa's €25M buyout in 2013 and most would have called him a marquee signing whereas Adam Lallana arrived for £25M this summer and few at the time were thinking of him in similar terms despite that he was coming off a season where he was the best attacking midfielder in England. David Silva, on the other hand, who is a similar style of player to Lallana and who Lallana was better than last season, would be a marquee signing. So. Got it? Us neither.

calm down

No.

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