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Liverpool Launch New Away Shirts. They Are Stupid.

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Liverpool's new away shirts are released by the club and Warrior, and they're bad, folks. Very bad. Historically bad.

Michael Regan

Warrior promised to be bold and innovative and have awkwardly worded catch phrases that nobody understood when they scooped up the sponsorship deal for Liverpool's kits last season, and they've managed to deliver smart-looking home shirts each of the past two seasons. The collared version from the most recent season is one of my favorites in some time, and the version they drew up for the coming season is similarly impressive if not quite as good. No problems there, Warrior--well done on not screwing up an all-red kit.

The away shirts from last season were a little confusing, an off-the-mark tribute to Liverpool's kits of old that ended up looking more like scuba gear than football shirts. I maintain that they weren't bad to look at in person, but they were bettered by third shirts that were very nearly passable until Warrior decided to include the barb-wire/tribal pattern that they've become known for, because they are forever stuck in their sophomore year of college, where tribal patterns and posters of women in tank tops making out with each other are indicators of being awesome.

Today's release of the new away shirt reaches an all-time low--mostly as far as dignity and self-repect goes--for the club, who'll now be asked to wear ugly sweaters with a Magic Eye pattern of a liver bird any time there's a clash with the opposition away from Anfield. If the sun hits it just right, you can see the liver bird crying in shame.

Warrior and Liverpool--We Come Not to Make Away Shirts That People Will Find Pleasurable in Any Capacity Ever.