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With the match against Utrecht thudding to the ground like a colossal turd, it's more than a little quiet out there on the Liverpool front, but Charlie's up in the trees and there's a hint of agent orange in the air. So before Fulham offers up the chance to reach over and put your hand in a pile of goo that was your best friend's face as an early Christmas gift, let's see if there's anything out there to help get us through this brief lull.
Wait, no, that's a Patton reference by way of The Simpsons and doesn't work for the whole 60s-70s violence and social upheaval angle I was going for. Fuck it, time to get to the choppa anyhow. Damn, that doesn't work either...
* You know it's getting close to the end of the year when various lists and best of X, Y, and X stories start popping up, and while we may be woefully unprepared on that front, the Liverpool Echo isn't. They've even used the grey area around just when decades begin and end to ask people what the LFC team of the decade is--some people say a decade runs from the one to the ten, others from the zero to the nine, and the Echo has decided to blow our minds and say they go from the zero to the ten.
So apparently there are eleven years in a decade now, at least according to the Echo, but that's really beside the point because YEAR END POLL!!!1! They've got it mostly set up 4-4-2, which doesn't even work for our best of the decade, let alone our current squad, but for the most part I went along with their editorial leanings and picked a sqaud of Reina, Arbeloa, Riise, Hyypia, Carragher, Kuyt, Garcia, Alonso, Gerrard, and Torres. Then I went with God rather than their preferred candidate Owen because fuck Michael Owen. So go have your vote counted, and let us know what you think the best eleven is in the comments. You know, if you feel like it and the man hasn't got you feeling too down.
* With a tip of the hat to Grubb, The Tomkins Times recently had a piece comparing Torres' first sixteen games in each of his years with the club, looking at the statistics and crunching the numbers to try to find out whether he's underperforming--or sulking, as some would have it--or if it's the system that's hobbling him. The occasional "Hurr! Torres sucks! Durr!" commenter aside, I doubt most will be surprised by the answer, but it's nice to have some numbers to back it up. The biggest significance for me comes from the heat maps the article's author has included that clearly show Torres spending much more time this season in the middle third of the pitch where in past years he spent most of his time in the forward third: in the end it's not that he's getting fewer touches or running less, it's that he's getting those touches and doing that running much farther away from goal than in the past. Then again, if you have some LSD lying around the heat maps might tell you something else entirely, and I rather suspect it would be more fun than what they told me.
* And I suppose it's mostly a dotting of Ts and crossing of Is (and that looks just really freaky and wrong written down, man), but the financial details of the club's sale to Henry and the rest of the fat cats at NESV recently came out and they paid around £218M for the club's equity and £83M to cover its debt, which is pretty much spot on the £300M mark that was previously talked about. Because who cares about a million pounds here or there when you're talking about hundreds of them? And would anybody really miss it if a few quid got lost and found its way into my bank account?
Well, I'm glad I could rock you like a hurricane this morning. Eh? Eh? Eh... Oh, I give up. In the meantime, in an attempt to make both RedLiverBirdFC and Ed happy, and in all likelihood failing completely in the process...