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The Daily Diatribe: Sad, sad Chelsea, Simao Sabrosa: a dream signing, Kids win warm-up, Pennant gets recognition, & Spectator banned for racial remarks

* Oh, those crazy Chelsea fans! First, they try to claim Benitez is reigniting the never ending war of words by responding to the Chelsea boss' excuses of too many fixtures and not enough time, with saying he's not going to play Mourinho's mind games. Only Chelsea fans' fragile and delusional egos would take that as a vocal jab. Now they are desperately trying to spin the words of Bolo and Xabi to make us look pompous. The thin-skinned glory hunters took it personal when Bolo referred to the hard-earned five stars associated with the LFC logo. God forbid a team's accomplishments deserve recognition, I mean maybe Chelsea should have two pound notes or even better two ruble notes to signify their two Premiership titles. Then Bolo made the huge mistake of saying that we're going after number six this year. What are you doing Zenden?! Then, just to top of this huge ice cream Sunday of ego huff with some chocolate syrup of conceit, Bolo dared to call Rafa 'a master technician.' Those words should be rescinded at once! How dare he?! To make matters worse, Xabi came out and said that Stamford Bridge doesn't intimidate us, that we need to score goals there to assure an easier home leg, and get this, if LFC plays better than Chelsea, they should win. Man, that Xabi guy has a lot of nerve.

* It is no secret of our desire to add Simao Sabrosa to our squad. He would be invaluable as a left wing and emergency striker. The waiting on Kewell has gone on for long enough and Gonzo, as demonstrated Saturday, just isn't getting it done. Hell, Pennant played better on the left. I think Simao and Alves should be without a doubt our top priorities this summer, followed by a striker. We can get by with the group of strikers we have with Voronin coming in.

* The kids beat the Newcastle Youth team for the third straight time in a warm-up to Thursday's second leg FA Youth Cup final with Man U. The most impressive aspect of this match is that we started a young Youth team, sitting ten players from our Youth team regulars. The least impressive aspect is the fact that after going up three goals to none in the first half behind netters by Mattone Awang, Michael Scott, and Ben Parsonage, they allowed Newcastle to score three unanswered goals in the first 15 minutes of the second to even it up. It took super-sub Charlie Barnett a late goal to give the LFC youngsters the win.

* Pennant was named to Goal.com's best eleven of the week despite not having even close to his best match of the year. Even though the recognition is nice, it's about damn time. Kuyt was named as well.

* LFC announced today that Jonathan McInally, from Back Lane in Little Crosby, has been banned for three years from Anfield for chanting racial abuse. He was busted by an undercover police operation during the Manchester United match. It's about time a club does something about such disgusting behavior, though I don't expect other (certain) clubs to follow suit.

* Finally, the excuses have began. Ballack and Carvalho are doubtful for the first leg of the Chelsea Champion's League match. Oh dear, their two best players might not play.